I'm sure you'll eventually figure out what I'm all about.
Well, I can honestly say I know what that feels like. You can sit there and make “pacts” with your friends saying you’ll never do this or that, but as we grow, we all grow in different directions. I’m definitely not saying that their new habits are something that I agree with, but sometimes our values change, and for whatever reason, we do things we never thought we would do. A lot of times, it’s a phase and we grow out of that as well, and other times we get sucked in and it becomes a habit or a lifestyle, which can obviously dangerous.
It’s not that it upsets you because they said they would never do it, it’s that what they are doing is harmful and you care about them. We can sit down and talk to our friends and express how we feel, but then it’s up to them to make the decision. I have sat down with friends and tried talking maturely, expressing how much I care about them, scolding them, joking or making light of the situation…and multiple other approaches but when it comes down to it, you can’t force someone to change. They have to want to change, but maybe you can help them see why they might want to make that decision.
You may not even want to be around them as much, but always let them know that you’re there for them. There is usually a reason as to why people make these decisions, and it always varies. Sometimes they won’t be ready to talk about it, and it’s possible that they haven’t even admitted it to themselves yet, but when they’re ready, you should be there. They may not have anyone else to talk to. You don’t have to be around them to be there for them.